Pasangan Sama Jantina
Disclaimer: Kisah berikut tidak ada kena mengena sama ada dengan mereka yang hidup atau mati. Sebarang persamaan adalah bersumberkan bacaan & daya imaginasi pengarang & interwoven with some personal anecdotes aka tipuan belaka.
P/s: Dedicated to you-know-who-you-are (my prayers are with you & family in time of need- hope FIL will get better insyaAllah)
"...I hope you don't mind
I hope don't you mind
That I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world..." Your Song - Elt*n John
___
I read sumwhere that everyone sorta have their respective male & female ‘feelings/sides’ (teori barat belaka ni) inside their body. Like when I drive (except parallel parking hohoho), buka gelanggang & not pulling in my punch – long ago, kid being home alone etc. basically gimme all the male preferred stuffs except cookings (I know, I know – guys make a better cook like Chef W*n, Chef Ism*il - you know what I mean), I almost feel like a manly male, can tackle anything in this world.
Few times I did wonder, am I really a female? Or perhaps a male entrapped in a female body? I kept on asking mak whether she did remember my time of (female) circumcision. Reason being - if anything isn’t normal, definitely she’d have noticed by then, funny right?
When I was in a respectable but less known boarding school (unlike those well-known @ infamous for -- ones), there was some 'extra special' pet sisters relationship going on at the girls’ hostel but that’s pretty much what I knew about it. Maybe I wasn’t into noticing things then…(Liza oh lizawati..rber?)
And there was my first real crush. (background music: It must have been love but it’s over now…1990)
And more crushes..truly deeply madly one-sided thus crash boom bang (until the new millenium)!!!
And eventually broken hearts...
Definitely it was 'guys' that I’m talking about here.
So, life goes on & I got to know this one lady recently, just a lil' bit older than me & she doesn’t really look like it. We become close, me being loner-me, relatively closer than with other people. Maybe we just hit it off right away. She’s married by the way, with loving husband & kids. I would say she understand me really well, always saying all the right things & we never run out of topics to talk about. And we will follow it with sporadic messages after office hour – nothing much really except to encourage each other, letting know plan for the next day etc. (she is careful too so as not to freak me out like the younger guy did - this is a compliment ok!). I tell you, all my married colleagues or even so-called best friends, after office hour, their life sorta revolve around their family but this one lady – she make an effort to make time for moi! Not asking me for any help or whatsoever. Hmm...
In one of the msgs – she said, I’m her idol! I was struck shysospeechless. Whatever the context she’s thinking of, I’m definitely not worthy of such hero-worshipped.
Ok, I noticed that she got other friends too – both males & females.
One fine day, we talked as usual & she told me of this story.
While working in a department, she got closer to a young problematic person (rape victims are usually traumatized for life, how I wish the male person who rape any female got raped by all the males in prison himself so that he knows how the encroachment into a person physical body break her into pieces & that she will never be the same ever again – play havoc with her mind & things like that) as it’s her line of work anyway. Over the years, she helped the miserable girl (with constant urges to commit suicide) to get on with life. Eventually the girl also settled down with her own happy, happy family unit. And they keep in touch with each other by going out for lunches with kids in tow every now & then.
Out of the blue, the girl confessed – that she always has deep feelings for her. Yes, she loves her hubby and kids, no problem with her marriage at all. But she realised that her true feelings are always for my friend since they’re always together throughout the ups & downs in her life. You wanna know what’s my new friend’s reply to that resounding declaration of love?
Oh, I love you too dear, very much as you love me. (Pause)
But, you know what (upbeat tempo)– as much as I want to be together with you for the rest of my life, it will break too many hearts. We both love our husbands too right? I tell you what, let’s just stay the way we‘re now. Just know that I love you too & will always be there for you. (Ed.- And respectively, they live happily ever after.)
So, what do you think? ! (Sometimes, I’ve a feeling that she’s testing me out like - is that the reason why I’m not married? Surely not!! Hehehe..)
Being an open-minded (konon) person, I have nothing against certain guys e.g. singers of ‘Don’t let the sun go down (clue?) on me yeah….or Wake me up before you go-go’ (am so into ‘80s right now). Nothing wrong if he wanted to wear wedding tuxedo with long skirt. After all, the Highlanders look very manly & sexy in their kilts. Or that boy bands group members. They didn’t break any law & it’s all legalised anyway in the West. BTW, the vernacular word for it, people, is gay, not faggot (quoted from Now I pronounce you Chuck & Larry). There’re differences between mere crossdressers@transvestites and XY or YY or XX …whatever.
But for Muslims same sex couples (our esteemed politicians some more?) – it ain’t right at all. Yes, you might have that feelings. All I’m saying is that, you don’t have to act on that feeling. For me, things are always either black or white. No compromise. No grey area. And my feelings are confirmed perempuan lah…
___
Balik kampong
Asked one of my nephews at kampong just now (short stay during the school holidays) –
Tengok tv sampai kul baper mlm tadi? Bangun subuh tak?
…Ha, pukul berapa?
..Apa?!! Pukul 7?
Ala, maksu pun sama.
Er, er – maksu lain….(hung head in shame).
I tell you, I can easily wake up at 4am or even 1 or 2am when I’m at my own place but when it comes to kampong – I become this budak balik dari asrama (a habit since I was 13 that is why I can never study/work at kampong- almost 20 years already –no wonder la) who is always sleeping day in, day out. Tidur cepat, bgn lambat –dah la tu, kena kejut/jerit lagi. Belum lagi part tido siang…
The worst part is when I (usually) cilok from doing any work in the kitchen during the family lunch preparation. Since I’ve to hide my presence, what else to do other than to retire to my room and ..sleep lah!
By the time everybody had their lunch & late for Zuhur, I’ll tersipu-sipu kuar…or kalau ada tetamu lagilah teruk kena kutuk depan2. Heheheh…
___
To call or not to call?
And when is the right time to call?
This is the part of being singles that I'm honestly fed-up with. I'm done being the aggressor. Been there & done that. Call immediately after I got the number but then...*tet!* Wrong timing! By the time he called back, I'm no longer in the mood.
Now, the ball is in his (another he) court. He got my no. so yes, I'm waiting.
Hey, come on la - we're not getting younger any minutes now or later.
And my mind was thinking like, what am I gonna talk about (if he call)!??
(Lecehnya jadi pompuan)
Next round, who should call first? Euwwwwww!!!
P/s: Honestly, I can't even remember who or which one was he now...
Disclaimer: Kisah berikut tidak ada kena mengena sama ada dengan mereka yang hidup atau mati. Sebarang persamaan adalah bersumberkan bacaan & daya imaginasi pengarang & interwoven with some personal anecdotes aka tipuan belaka.
P/s: Dedicated to you-know-who-you-are (my prayers are with you & family in time of need- hope FIL will get better insyaAllah)
"...I hope you don't mind
I hope don't you mind
That I put down in words
How wonderful life is while you're in the world..." Your Song - Elt*n John
___
I read sumwhere that everyone sorta have their respective male & female ‘feelings/sides’ (teori barat belaka ni) inside their body. Like when I drive (except parallel parking hohoho), buka gelanggang & not pulling in my punch – long ago, kid being home alone etc. basically gimme all the male preferred stuffs except cookings (I know, I know – guys make a better cook like Chef W*n, Chef Ism*il - you know what I mean), I almost feel like a manly male, can tackle anything in this world.
Few times I did wonder, am I really a female? Or perhaps a male entrapped in a female body? I kept on asking mak whether she did remember my time of (female) circumcision. Reason being - if anything isn’t normal, definitely she’d have noticed by then, funny right?
When I was in a respectable but less known boarding school (unlike those well-known @ infamous for -- ones), there was some 'extra special' pet sisters relationship going on at the girls’ hostel but that’s pretty much what I knew about it. Maybe I wasn’t into noticing things then…(Liza oh lizawati..rber?)
And there was my first real crush. (background music: It must have been love but it’s over now…1990)
And more crushes..truly deeply madly one-sided thus crash boom bang (until the new millenium)!!!
And eventually broken hearts...
Definitely it was 'guys' that I’m talking about here.
So, life goes on & I got to know this one lady recently, just a lil' bit older than me & she doesn’t really look like it. We become close, me being loner-me, relatively closer than with other people. Maybe we just hit it off right away. She’s married by the way, with loving husband & kids. I would say she understand me really well, always saying all the right things & we never run out of topics to talk about. And we will follow it with sporadic messages after office hour – nothing much really except to encourage each other, letting know plan for the next day etc. (she is careful too so as not to freak me out like the younger guy did - this is a compliment ok!). I tell you, all my married colleagues or even so-called best friends, after office hour, their life sorta revolve around their family but this one lady – she make an effort to make time for moi! Not asking me for any help or whatsoever. Hmm...
In one of the msgs – she said, I’m her idol! I was struck shysospeechless. Whatever the context she’s thinking of, I’m definitely not worthy of such hero-worshipped.
Ok, I noticed that she got other friends too – both males & females.
One fine day, we talked as usual & she told me of this story.
While working in a department, she got closer to a young problematic person (rape victims are usually traumatized for life, how I wish the male person who rape any female got raped by all the males in prison himself so that he knows how the encroachment into a person physical body break her into pieces & that she will never be the same ever again – play havoc with her mind & things like that) as it’s her line of work anyway. Over the years, she helped the miserable girl (with constant urges to commit suicide) to get on with life. Eventually the girl also settled down with her own happy, happy family unit. And they keep in touch with each other by going out for lunches with kids in tow every now & then.
Out of the blue, the girl confessed – that she always has deep feelings for her. Yes, she loves her hubby and kids, no problem with her marriage at all. But she realised that her true feelings are always for my friend since they’re always together throughout the ups & downs in her life. You wanna know what’s my new friend’s reply to that resounding declaration of love?
Oh, I love you too dear, very much as you love me. (Pause)
But, you know what (upbeat tempo)– as much as I want to be together with you for the rest of my life, it will break too many hearts. We both love our husbands too right? I tell you what, let’s just stay the way we‘re now. Just know that I love you too & will always be there for you. (Ed.- And respectively, they live happily ever after.)
So, what do you think? ! (Sometimes, I’ve a feeling that she’s testing me out like - is that the reason why I’m not married? Surely not!! Hehehe..)
Being an open-minded (konon) person, I have nothing against certain guys e.g. singers of ‘Don’t let the sun go down (clue?) on me yeah….or Wake me up before you go-go’ (am so into ‘80s right now). Nothing wrong if he wanted to wear wedding tuxedo with long skirt. After all, the Highlanders look very manly & sexy in their kilts. Or that boy bands group members. They didn’t break any law & it’s all legalised anyway in the West. BTW, the vernacular word for it, people, is gay, not faggot (quoted from Now I pronounce you Chuck & Larry). There’re differences between mere crossdressers@transvestites and XY or YY or XX …whatever.
But for Muslims same sex couples (our esteemed politicians some more?) – it ain’t right at all. Yes, you might have that feelings. All I’m saying is that, you don’t have to act on that feeling. For me, things are always either black or white. No compromise. No grey area. And my feelings are confirmed perempuan lah…
___
Balik kampong
Asked one of my nephews at kampong just now (short stay during the school holidays) –
Tengok tv sampai kul baper mlm tadi? Bangun subuh tak?
…Ha, pukul berapa?
..Apa?!! Pukul 7?
Ala, maksu pun sama.
Er, er – maksu lain….(hung head in shame).
I tell you, I can easily wake up at 4am or even 1 or 2am when I’m at my own place but when it comes to kampong – I become this budak balik dari asrama (a habit since I was 13 that is why I can never study/work at kampong- almost 20 years already –no wonder la) who is always sleeping day in, day out. Tidur cepat, bgn lambat –dah la tu, kena kejut/jerit lagi. Belum lagi part tido siang…
The worst part is when I (usually) cilok from doing any work in the kitchen during the family lunch preparation. Since I’ve to hide my presence, what else to do other than to retire to my room and ..sleep lah!
By the time everybody had their lunch & late for Zuhur, I’ll tersipu-sipu kuar…or kalau ada tetamu lagilah teruk kena kutuk depan2. Heheheh…
___
To call or not to call?
And when is the right time to call?
This is the part of being singles that I'm honestly fed-up with. I'm done being the aggressor. Been there & done that. Call immediately after I got the number but then...*tet!* Wrong timing! By the time he called back, I'm no longer in the mood.
Now, the ball is in his (another he) court. He got my no. so yes, I'm waiting.
Hey, come on la - we're not getting younger any minutes now or later.
And my mind was thinking like, what am I gonna talk about (if he call)!??
(Lecehnya jadi pompuan)
Next round, who should call first? Euwwwwww!!!
P/s: Honestly, I can't even remember who or which one was he now...
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