Et cetera

1. I’ve been warned not to bad mouth my advisors by the ‘ustazah’, “Macam mana nak siap kalau asyik mengata depa..” So, consider my mouth is sealed. But it’s killing me softly… with their so-called un-…-ism. I look, I see… and compare with other colleagues’ experience so I know that I’m not judging them wrongly..biarlah Allah jua yang membalasnya if I’m being treated un-…-ly. What is …-ness you might wonder? Honestly, I've no idea & I couldn’t even stomach seeing them in the current mood that I’m having…it’s so difficult to bersangka baik. What else to do eh? I’m going to push myself harder & do my very best to please them, insyaAllah. And play hide ‘n seek too. Quoted sms exchanged with a fren: Even if we die in trying to deliver… *Wah-wah!*

2. My mak came all the way from kampong to give me some money *blushing* (at the age of 32, too old to be the receiving end of mak’s scholarship – I know). The varsity made a new ruling recently – tuition fees to be paid in full before you can even register for the semester, which cause havoc with some students especially those foreigners and those without scholarship – usually they pay by installments and mostly likely at the end of the semester. Since my poor-student days in UEL (at one time, I had just very few pounds on me & a long wait for the next allowance to be bank-in, never like credits either), I never like having a low balance in my account. Thus, the need for a loan from mak while waiting for some money to be bank in/ exchange some dollars. But she said (witnessed by my sisters & bro), “..bagi terus, apa pulak pinjam2! Kau tu kan bawah tanggungan mak.” To the envy of my siblings- I kid you not- jokingly I told them, “..layak terima zakat dah ni.”

3. Ranting - Knowing me la kan, do you think that I would purposely or unintentionally forget about money owed to me? Whether it has been paid back? I hate it when my good intention when I gave out the money (qardhul hassan, sebaik2 pinjaman) is not return in kind instead planting seeds of doubt in my mind adalah….That is why Islam says, whenever you loan things, make sure you have it in written form, with 2 witnesses to sanctify everything. And I don’t want your pity or your money pun. As for digicam, next time you want to borrow it – I’ll have in written form too esp. the due date. So that 3 days did not turn to 2 weeks. BTW, I charged only 10bucks a day.

4. On Sunday evening tu, I met mak at one of my sis’s place. She brought rendang maman, cooked using ayam belaan sendiri ok (not ayam kampong coz beli anak ayam dari kedai). I know she really loves me extra since she made a special chicken curry – as I don’t eat rendang (actually I don’t like to eat curry either but she cooked especially for me –Awwwww…). And bubur kacang – plus durian. My other sis (the one who stay with mak) prepared mee goreng when I’d already bought packets of mee mamak. Between me & mak, we kinda agree never to let her cook mee goreng coz – tak sedap! Of course, we never let the cat out of the bag – the truth hurts! Why am I telling/torturing you with all these salivating details? Imagine them coming all the way from kampong (since I couldn’t go back) and breaking a sweat cooking those delicious meals (mak is old) – which I didn’t ask for – except that I made it a point to ask mak what’s cooking in every phone calls. (What else to talk about? Tired of talking about the weather.) Oh, they really shouldn’t have to…

5. The ‘younger’ guy smsed again. Asking me out for a dinner ('ikhlas ni'?). My excuse this time, I’m out of town. He’s persistent though. The point is why didn’t he take the hint? I’m not interested in whatever he wants– as a mere friend ke, kakak angkat ke, (future) colleague ke…I made a mistake of going out for lunch with him just once. But, please do not think that I make a habit of dating/going out with simply anyone (can count with one hand ok). Why didn’t I simply say no? Because we’re going to work in the same institution –chances are he’s going back there before me & I don’t want my reputation to supersede my so-called homecoming (bleh!).

6. I know PJ like the back of my hand already (konon)– been there half of the weekdays for the past 2 weeks – data collections, interview & hospital visits. So, you thought you can beat the evening traffic jam using back entrance/road? You’re dead wrong!
The ground floor staff already familiar with my face (again), “Tak habis lagi ke?*sungguh sadis sekali*” The level 5 staff/officers finally, “Oh, inilah rad…” since all previous communications/documentations are in my name. Did you know that government servants in PJ are so lucky? Aside from the coming end of this month pay rise? I went to Parcel D, there’s in-door bazaar with lotsa stalls selling ready-made kurungs, kain ela, packaged food inc. frozen, brooches, ready-made clothing for male & female, & lots more. The next day, I went to Parcel C, also got a bazaar. I bet they can stock up for raya completely in between office hours. One of the male staff explained, the same sellers move from parcel to parcel. For Parcel C, it is every last Friday of the month (after salary is in) and the first Friday of the month. The female staff also excitedly shared the fact that the prices of things are even lower than those of p.malam/elsewhere!

7. Remember my pregnant but bleeding friend? I was getting some shut eyes during Friday prayer time when her call came in. She’s already at the hospital. She drove herself for normal check-up. The doctor said (marah actually), “Dah dua hari sakit baru nak datang? You tau tak ini adalah contractions?” She (first pregnancy) thought it was simply the baby with his normal athletic/jumping/movement around. Since she already used a guarantee letter for registering at the O&G clinic, she needed another GL in order to be warded on the same day. Stupid kan? It’s the same hospital & on the same day too. Never heard of computer record system ah? So, rad to the rescue again. Pick up the GL from her work place (long story - Never heard of fax machine eh?) and visited her at the hospital.

Since she had no close family or relatives around (hubby in East Coast) so I stayed on to chat (visiting hours 4-8pm). She asked me (looking so scared), “Why is this happening? Why the bleeding is non-stop? I takut…”
I said (this is like orang buta menunjuk jalan), “Maybe it’s nature way of telling you, the baby isn’t meant to be..blahblah…but there’s hope yet if you…” A nurse came to check on her – she’s having two contractions in 10 minutes! (Lesson learnt: 3x in 10min means very near delivery time). Around 5:30pm, a group of nurses came to bring her to the D.Bersalin –doctor’s order. She thought she’s gonna walk down there so when one of the nurse said, “Kak baring atas katil ni, kami yang tolak…” then only the significance of the situation hit her. Tergamam jadinya…Since only staff are allowed in delivery hall/room, I only managed to try sedapkan hati dia, “Rilex ah, they’re sending you downstairs for observation only…coz the doctors are there.”

Now, the problem is no handbag (hp inc.) are allowed in there too. She can’t leave it at the ward. She can’t leave it with me since she needs the house & car keys & everything in case her hubby/family came in. The nurses at the counter don’t want to be held responsible. Siap ckp, “Suaminya mana?” Cis, takde kompromi langsung!

8. 070707 - Further check by the specialist revealed that all this while she’s bleeding/spotting, air ketuban (what is this in English eh?) dah pun pecah & almost nak kering. That explained the early contractions. If it’s only bleeding, the mother can be put on bed rest at least until 7 months so that bigger chances of survival for the baby. As it was, the doctor was merely injecting her with some medicines to help further develop the baby’s lung. It was never a question of saving her or the baby coz even if the baby was born naturally then, he will never survived due to poorly developed organs (cannot even be put on ventilator) and the longer she holds on to the pregnancy, the higher risk to her own life. So, she asked the doctor to do what’s best (she’s in real pain – contraction bukan setakat perut mengeras but sakit sampai ke belakang pinggang). And around 2am, July 7th, he was born – lengkap seluruh anggota but breathing only for a short while. She chose not to hold him or even had a glimpse of him. Finally, the father and grandmother arrived all the way from East Coast at 4am. He’d already gone, Innalillahiwainna ilaihiraji’un (dari Allah dia datang & kepadaNya dia kembali).

9. The father (not-to-be) & the grandma decided to bury him in PJ since there’re a lot of things to settle around here. Since he was born cukup sifat & breathing on his own, he was given proper burial – dimandi, dikafankan & solat jenazah led by an ustaz. Of course, there’re a lot of hassles involved since they’re not resident of PJ (bukan kariah). And the day being supposedly auspicious with so many weddings going on such that all the imams are being kept busy.

10. D&C is really painful. Imagine kena seluk down there. I saw my mak did it once to a lembu yang sukar nak beranak. Erghh!!

11. You're entitled to full maternity leave (60 days) if and only if the baby weighted more than 500g & 24th weeks or more. Otherwise, it's considered only as an abortion. Sad but it's true. But she's a real fighter so eventually she got the maternity leave. It helps if you know your rights too.

12. Lawak bodoh - Big mouth wide open (again on the lift)
On my way back from office yesterday (around 6 - MBA executive classes start at 6pm), somebody stopped & asked me for direction to one of the lecture halls (DK). I’m not sure where exactly that hall is (usually for undergraduate classes) but I offered to show her the way downstairs. We took the lift. Since she’s looking for the MBA cls (showed me the time-table and all), I asked her whether she’s sponsored or self-financing (money weighing a lot on my mind). She looked blur really but smiling– no reply. Heedless to that, I properly introduced myself … blahblah. Note: I don’t make a habit of making small talk with strangers – shy lor. It was just that an hour earlier I’d been ‘consulting’ a new PhD student (a lady I met in a recent meeting, govt officer, 40s – stranger gak la) which is what always happen in every new semester. Then we reached the corridor of seminar rooms and started looking for the exact room no. While I was saying ‘I dunno exactly..’ somebody came out from one of the rooms and said, “Dr Wan ye, here…” Arghhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! She’s THE (imported) lecturer la….I sound so stupid!! Duh-duh!

P/s: No wonder she’s smiling…

Moral: Don’t presume on things which you utterly have no info about.

13. I promised myself I'll blog only if significant progress is being made. Alhamdulillah, a minuscule problem that had been bugging me for days had been solved just now by -who else? -my no.1 advisor! I love her (grateful & indebted) so much!! I've been running around & asking all the lab technicians, colleagues, lecturers who teach Aplikasi Komputers & even emailed a stranger in BNM! Er, I avoided her in the first place - silly of me.