Tuesday, June 17, 2008

Pillow Talk: Death (Part I)

Like I said somewhere earlier, from time to time (or more often than not) I’ll be sleeping at night (siang lain citer ah..) at either of Vic’s or B’s respective places. These are aside from the once-a-month-now weekend jaunts to my hometown and the occasional duty calls at any of my siblings’ places. I try to wake up very early in the morning everyday to concentrate upon the T *add your sniggers here*.

One fine morning (Tues, 4th) at Vic’s place, at the early hour of not yet 6am, she (supposedly asleep) went downstairs to get me – only to tell me that her uncle’s passed away. Some time previously, she had already told me that the uncle was involved in a motorcycle accident and broke an arm (or was it a leg?). Other than that, he seemed to be fine, thus the family at hometown tried to hide the whole incident from his youngest son who at that time was staying (& supposedly studying at college – another secret to keep!) with Vic. So Vic was in the know but her mouth was sealed. Lucky that a couple of days later when the situation changed for worst, the boy was somehow informed & he went back straight away to look after the father. Vic was kinda nervous, as she might be scolded by him due to the keeping secret business. Well, the boy kept his head on his shoulder; he understands after all & was there with the father towards the very end.

After she went back for the funeral, I was back at her place again (upon request). While getting ready to settle down for the night (lights off & in our respective beds you see), we discussed our recent ongoings. As I had just received a call from my sister about my BIL#3 who was discharged on Monday but needed to go to clinic again that very evening due to difficulty in breathing, I voiced out my concerns over his deteriorating condition. The doctor, who is also my sis’s friend, wouldn’t even want to accept payment for service rendered. According to her, she has had other patients in more or less the same condition who didn’t even make it back home alive since there’s nothing much can be done by the clinic (died on the way back home). Since BIL wasn’t willing to be admitted to the hospital again, all that she can advised the family was to call for an ambulance if the situation get worsen at night.

I remember, I told Vic that I had just visited him last Friday at the hospital. I watched for a while, how he tried to sleep comfortably while sitting down on a chair with his head on the bed. It seems that he had already some difficulty in breathing whenever he lay down on bed (& batuk2) but I was more concerned about his bandaged right feet. Our conversation then was kinda awkward since my sis wasn’t around & I was kinda scared of him (bit on the garang side normally). I asked him about when he will be discharged (he said right after another visit to the OT for major cleanups of the gaping wound which was healing nicely) & he asked me about ‘bila nak abis exam’ (which annoyed me of course, berapa kali nak terang daaa..). I left him with these parting words: “Ada nak apa2 lain tak?" The savoury bun was for him while the sweet ones for others.

I do remember asking my sis (the one who called): “Sis tengok Bang Z tu tadi camano? Raso eh lamo laie tak?” Ye lah, signs of death are always there staring at our face only that sometimes we’re too blind to see…(The early evening immediately before my ayah passed away, there’re three female neighbours aka The Angels who came visiting & insisted to my Ah Long who was getting ready to leave for work at that time, “Kau jangan biarkan ayah kau dah ni …” Their combined experience told them that the time has come…drooping nose, almost straighten (& cold) feets, unlooking eyes, skin color,….)

And Vic’s shared her experience (I asked lotsa question) regarding her Uncle’s ceremony. Burial or cremation (depend on local customs, not all Hindus were cremated). How important it was for the anak-cucus to be around for the final rites. Cannot be done by pregnant woman etc. Naturally our pillow talks moved on to topics like what happen to life after death according to Islam, for Hindus, whether I believe in reincarnation. (in fb application: I was previously Mar*lyn Monroe *gasp!* Thus that’s how we went to sleep that Wed (4th) night.

Early morning the next day (Thurs, 5th), history repeated itself. I woke up early, tried to do some work. Around 3am, incoming message from my nephew: ayah was warded again. I msged him asking for further updates. Less than an hour later, another message came in stating that he had already passed away. Thus, my turn to go upstairs & wake her up upon the news. It’s almost surreal. Masin mulut kata orang dulu2.

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